I had a hair appointment this week and the way the salon is set up is kind of awkward. When you get your hair colored and you’re waiting for your hair to “process,” you have to sit in a section at the back of the salon where the chairs are arranged in a circle. It feels a little bit like an AA meeting, or a prayer group gathering. I dread the seating arrangement. This is because I’m an introvert and I feel that the circle forces me to be chatty with the other ladies. Rather than chat, I’d prefer to read a magazine, work on a crossword puzzle, or even meditate. Being forced to make small talk with strangers is my worst nightmare. At my recent hair appointment, however, I had my iPhone! So while my hair was processing, I was busily searching for new and interesting Apps.
My bliss was interrupted by the woman sitting to my right. The woman (let’s call her Betty) would not stop talking about the Grammy Awards. And Betty had her facts wrong. For instance, she asked us, “Did you see Rihanna sing that Alanis Morissette song? When did she marry Chris Brown? He looked handsome in his tuxedo. He’s really tall.” Betty was confusing Beyonce with Rihanna, and Jay-Z with Chris Brown.
Betty yapped on like this for about 15 minutes. I tried my best to block her voice out of my head, but then she moved on to Lady Gaga and Pink. And because Betty didn’t know her facts, she confused the two performers. Betty said, “I couldn’t believe Lady Gaga was naked. All she had on was a ribbon covering her boobs and a few sequins covering her lady parts. And what was the point of her flying like a trapeze artist?”
I loved Pink’s performance, so I piped in to set the record straight. I explained to Betty that Pink was the singer who wore a white robe and then stripped down to an awesome sparkly unitard, and that Lady Gaga performed at the opening of the Grammy’s with Elton John. Betty dismissed my input. She was certain I was incorrect.
This is when I grabbed my iPhone and searched for Pink’s Grammy performance. AT&T was working fast and I had the video in about 3 seconds. I held my iPhone up so Katie (my hair colorist) could watch along with me. Minus the romance, I felt like John Cusack holding his boom box over his head in “Say Anything.”
Betty stopped talking and turned her attention toward us and she asked me, “You recorded the Grammy’s? That’s a tiny VCR you have. Wait! You have the internet on your VCR? How is that possible?”
I could tell Betty wanted to hold my iPhone, but this wasn’t going to happen.
Later, when I was home, I wondered if having an iPhone made me an information snob. Why was I so hell bent on proving Betty wrong? And why wouldn’t I share with her? I felt like a jerk.